This has always been my challenge and my desire. When I am successful, amazing growth, understanding, acceptance happen.
Getting off that mouse wheel of Life is the struggle.
Then again, sometimes I’m so worried I won’t like the answer that I intentionally practice avoidance.
Like right now… I know job applications should be top of my list, but it’s scary putting myself “out there” and easy to laze in the “status quo.”
My boundaries have improved and I’ve been granted 2 days off instead of one. (It’s taken 2.5 years and a serious bout of burnout). Now, instead of moving toward the NEW I’m languishing in the FAMILIAR.
I see this quote in two parts: willingness to step outside my comfort zone AND willingness to be quiet with myself to hear the answer to the question, “What is my next step?”
For me, this is my “Unicorn”. In today’s world people SAY they are open minded and all inclusive, but what they mean is: THINK LIKE ME.
THINK LIKE “ME” Is impossible. Unless you are a computer. A computer only has the information YOU add. The WORLD doesn’t work this way.
Every person comes with their own unique personality traits, which shape and are shaped by their personal life experience and the perspective of the culture and place in which they live. This puts us each in our own way of perceiving the world and the information we take in. And… Holy Moly!! There is a lot to take in! All the time, everywhere!
Add in our culture, place of origin, family upbringing, social setting, and personal life experience… and you have an individual who could be working, living beside you with different outlook on life and every little piece in it. None of this makes them, their thought, belief’s, understanding of incoming information “Wrong” if it is different from yours.
I find it’s a rare person who can listen without judgement. It’s rare to find anyone I can have an open honest discussion about…anything, agree or disagree, and still respect each other as unique and beautiful people we are.
I feel blessed to have met 2 people (one being my husband) who I can share any thought or feeling, thought out or still in development process, without fear of judgment.
We may not agree, but we always respect each other’s thought process, life experience, and learned knowledge that has brought us to the discussion “table” as valid and honest.
Have you been fortunate to have a family member, spouse, partner or friend who has let you be yourself in all aspects of your “being”?
Lately, The Beach has been my temple. Before you think I’m crazy, hear me out.
The beach is a calm place where I connect with: Nature, The Universe, and God.
Do you have a special place?
When I feel lost, lonely, scared, angry, confused, stressed, depressed, or anxious; I turn to nature – most often the beach. Even in my mind, I can picture the sand, hear the waves and the seagulls, feel the breeze on my skin, smell the ocean water. The peace washes over me and a sense of calm is restored. This is when I can here God’s answers most clearly.
New Year’s Day was foggy and wet. Still a walk and the beach was healing and full of hope for the New Year.
I have spent most of my life living on one coast or the other in the USA. For this, I am blessed and grateful. I know this because I’ve spent short stints living in places that were land-locked… and my soul cried out constantly for the sea.
I know not everyone can live by an ocean. Even now, I technically live on “The Sound” which means no BIG WAVES.
Still, I am interested… is water your element? The ocean, the sound, the bay, the lake, the river, or the stream.
Is Earth your element? The woods, the mountain, the prairie, or the desert.
Are you a people-person who needs a building and a congregation? Church, Temple, Mosque.
Are you an Atheist or a Believer?
Where do you find healing? Is it God? Buddha? Hindi Gods & Goddesses? Mohammed? Christ? Nature? Mystical Energy? The Universe/Nature?
For me, I see “God” in all things. I love the teachings of Christ, The writings of Buddha, The energy of Nature, and the Mystery of Native and Celtic Mythology.
Wherever you are in your Faith Journey, I hope you feel the presence of a guiding Spirit holding you close and carrying you through these troubled times.
Not sure where everyone is with the holidays this year, but I’ve been struggling.
Two Fun Day were: December 3, The Annual Lamplight Stroll in Milford, CT with a great friend. This same friend brought the Holiday Spirit to my house today (December19).
God Bless good friends. They invite you to fun things and their excitement is so infectious, it rubs off and you get out of your way despite yourself!
I was so not in the mood to socialize… but I made myself go. The Lamplight Stroll night was so fun!
Shops were open late, the Town Green was lit up like a magical wonderland, with vendors hocking homemade wares. There were Carolers and sleigh rides (we did not partake). We were FREEZING! And we were LAUGHING!
We stopped in at a local restaurant for appetizers and dessert. We talked for hours. I stayed out WAAAY past my usual bedtime 😉. It was the most fun I’ve had with a friend in over a year.
Today’s fun: Gingerbread cookies, tea, a fire, painting rocks (painting!), Christmas music and hot cocoa.
My friend has been painting rocks for several years. Her rocks (pictures below) are spectacular! She is so talented with the tiny details!
So this is probably only the second time I’ve tried painting rocks. I decided to let go of expectations and just have fun with it.. no comparing myself to my friend and her superior skills. Just FUN!
My results are below. I’m pretty proud of my efforts.
Most important, we were RELAXED. We had FUN, we LAUGHED. We SANG along to Christmas songs. We sipped Hot Cocoa by the fire and gushed compliments on 16 for her cocoa-making skills.
I feel happy and relaxed. That’s not something I’ve felt often of late. I want to wallow in it. Roll around and cover myself with this happy, content feeling and ride it straight through the New Year!
The TRUTH is… at 3-years-old (2008), little Miss was Hell On Wheels. She tested EVERYTHING. The day this picture was taken, we had a 4-hour Showdown over cleaning up a mess.
There have been many moments I thought “I can’t do this, be the Mom she needs.” At 16-years-old (2021),I still sometimes feel the same way.
Still, it’s been an beautiful journey. I’m so proud to be THIS GIRL’S mom.
We guarded her childhood like we were on a MISSION. That Mission: for her to be a child for as long as possible.
2020 kinda blew that out of the water. Being bombarded with so much stuff and all of us “hanging on” for dear life. It seems like this almost 2 years have gone in Fast-Slow-Motion.
All of the sudden she’s 16, a Junior in High School, and one foot out the door to “Real Life.”
We’re now talking College and careers and all sorts of grownup things. She’ll be 17 soon, then I’ll BLINK and she’ll be 18 and heading off into The World.
GAHHH! Some days I really do want to go back to 3. It’s sounds crazy even as I say it… because 3 was HAIR-RAISING! But the challenges were smaller.
Today I worry:
Did I teach her enough?
Is she going to be ready for the things life throws her way?
Am I going to be ready to give her up to… LIFE?
As much as “people” like to wax poetic about “Enjoy Every Moment” parenthood is a non-stop Rollercoaster Ride: sometimes exhilarating, often terrifying, full of laughter and tears, a ride that ends at 18.
Of course, you NEVER stop being a parent, but the job is very different. You’re on the sidelines not in the event.
As someone who’s childhood was not protected, who “grew up” WAY too young, I am glad that my daughter has had the childhood I couldn’t have: carefree, play dates and imagination run amok.
I love the young woman she’s becoming and the evolution of our relationship. I also love reminiscing about play-do and dress up, glitter everywhere and slime, the excitement of “Firsts.”
Mundt Act was passed after World War 2 for legal propaganda against all other countries except the US. The US never stopped propagandized the public but the statute allowed us to hold them accountable.
The Patriot Act is unconstitutional, in 2012 right before Christmas, this Smith-Mundt Modernization Act was sneaked through a partial Congress with the National Defense Authorization Act. 2 weeks later Sandy Hook happened. This needs to be reauthorized every few years because it is so criminal.
I’m in Athens, Georgia for 2 weeks to help family. I love them and I’m happy to have a job that allows me to work from anywhere so I can be here to help when they need it.
Those who are in the Healthcare profession or are caregivers for loved ones know what this means. It’s an act of love, done gratefully and (hopefully) gracefully. It is also emotionally, mentally, and physically draining.
This is a reminder that it’s time to take a BREAK, or as I call it a “Time Out.”
I’ve been here a week and today I needed that “time out.” Luckily, the weather has started to turn for Autumn and the temperature/humidity has let up and cooled. So today, my time is being spent outside.
The Georgia Botanical Gardens has always been a favorite place for me, when I lived here and now when I visit.
As I sit by this beautiful water feature at the entrance to The Visitor Center, I feel my stress, sadness, anxiety and exhaustion melt away…
I hope you take a “Time Out” if you need it. Remember: you’re no good to anyone if you’re not good to yourself ❤️
PLEASE! Tell me I’m not the only person who struggles with this conundrum!
What do you do when you want attention?
What if you don’t want to ASK for attention?
We want attention. We want certain kinds of attention. We want others to know what we want without having to ASK.
The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman, deals with this issue from the marriage/relationship aspect. If you haven’t read it, I highly recommend it. Discovering your “love language” can be a HUGE boost to your relationship. More importantly, knowing your partner’s love language could completely transform the way you communicate with each other.
With friendships, I find this “need” for reciprocal attention, time, or interest much harder to figure out. A lot of MY problems in this area can be attributed to my “people-pleasing” tendencies. This bad habit has blurred the lines and been ineffective in developing reciprocal relationships with others.
So…I reach out to YOU, dear readers, for your experience, expertise, and resources.
HOW do you get your needs met with friendships?
How do you determine: when to stay or walk away?
What traits tell you THIS will be a friendship worth investing in?
I’m looking for honest experience and honest answers, especially if you’ve overcome a “People-Pleaser” personality issue.