Personal Growth

Are You Getting the Affection You Crave?

Of course we all want affection and attention.

By Bill Watterson

PLEASE! Tell me I’m not the only person who struggles with this conundrum!

What do you do when you want attention?

What if you don’t want to ASK for attention?

We want attention. We want certain kinds of attention. We want others to know what we want without having to ASK.

Sound Familiar?

The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman, deals with this issue from the marriage/relationship aspect. If you haven’t read it, I highly recommend it. Discovering your “love language” can be a HUGE boost to your relationship. More importantly, knowing your partner’s love language could completely transform the way you communicate with each other.

With friendships, I find this “need” for reciprocal attention, time, or interest much harder to figure out. A lot of MY problems in this area can be attributed to my “people-pleasing” tendencies. This bad habit has blurred the lines and been ineffective in developing reciprocal relationships with others.

So…I reach out to YOU, dear readers, for your experience, expertise, and resources.

HOW do you get your needs met with friendships?

How do you determine: when to stay or walk away?

What traits tell you THIS will be a friendship worth investing in?

I’m looking for honest experience and honest answers, especially if you’ve overcome a “People-Pleaser” personality issue.

Food For Thought

I Am The Cage AND The Key

Suntan via Pinterest

How many times do we feel stuck?

I know I feel that way often… especially in this never-ending alternate reality we seem to be living in since February 2020.

Are there things we cannot change and control? YES!

Do they outnumber or outweigh the things we CAN control? 🤔 I say, NO!!

It’s easy to forget how truly powerful the individual is while being bombarded with so much “noise” from the media, social or otherwise.

Where does Personal Power exist?

  • Our CHOICES: How do I choose to perceive, feel, react to what is happening to me and around me? What Action will it take (or not take)?
  • Our ATTITUDE: Do I see this event, incident, interaction as positive or negative? An opportunity or a stumbling block? A Chance to grow and learn or a Victimization?
  • Our ability to seek/ask for HELP: where do you go for assistance and support? Are those supportive, positive people/places? Are those angry, wallowing people places?

The above 3 Personal Power “Keys” are only effective if they are Empowering you to open the Cage. Otherwise, they ARE your Cage.

Your thoughts?

Personal Growth

The Ugly Truth

Working up the nerve and the faith to write about my life raw and unvarnished. Just facing the journaling process is intimidating.

Anyone out there with experience sharing their hard-won experience honestly and without color?

Please share your thoughts.

I’ll be posting as I make progress on my journey.

Random Thoughts

Your Trials~A Survival Story

Food For Thought · Personal Growth

LIFE IS MESSY: Do It Anyway

So… this past week my time-management skills and work-life balance were a little (a lot) off kilter.

I “glanced” at my Make Art Everyday book, everyday… but I was so brain tired and emotionally drained that I did NOTHING.

Saturday came and work had slowed some, I’d processed some emotional upheaval, and 15 had a BFF over. Suddenly, I found myself at loose ends with a wandering mind and restless hands. Voila!! Time for some ART PROMPTS.

So I didn’t make art everyday, but I still made ART!

Make Art Everyday:Week 6

Lesson for me (always): progress not perfection.

Did I follow My Plan perfectly? No.

Did I stumble and procrastinate? Yes.

Did I get it done? Yes.

Life is messy. Some days my “Best” is not so great. Some days my “Best” is Awesome! … and some days I just show up and make it to bedtime without creating a bigger mess.

Those really “messy” days are full of pain and “shoulds” and “I’ll never be good enough”…. and THOSE are the days I have to work really hard to love myself, so I can make it to my productive, awesome days.

This week had more messy days than usual, but I got in my Awesome on Saturday and made it up to myself with Art ❤️.

Personal Growth

Work in Progress

Today’s Wins:

  1. Got up early!
  2. Did stretches!
  3. Watched the sunrise
  4. Gratitude Journaling
  5. Had 16 oz water, cup of coffee, & ate breakfast
  6. Reached out to a friend with an honest and vulnerable heart
  7. Had a good cry
  8. Showered and dressed
    …. ALL BEFORE 8am! & start of work!

Also:

  • took time to have a phone conversation, I miss hearing my friends voices!
  • Set a timer for lunch break! … AND took a lunch break!

Yeah! Balance!

Other Blogs

Practising Loving Kindness

WOW! So on-target with what I’m working on right now.

If you need help with ding love and kindness for yourself and others, this article lays out the perfect way to start!
— Read on empress2inspire.blog/2020/12/26/practising-loving-kindness/

Other Blogs

Drop The Titles, We Are All Americans

A powerful piece by Edge of Humanity. Spot ON.

#onenation
— Read on edgeofhumanity.com/2020/12/27/drop-the-titles-we-are-all-americans/

Food For Thought

Inspiration from UJ Ramdas

Inspiration from Five Minute Journal App ❤️

Personal Growth

Learning to Let Go… or NOT, in My Case

Christmas 2020

A few things that bring me joy and gratitude this morning: Christmas Tree at Sunrise. Vanilla Carmel coffee. Morning breathing exercise. Three new ornaments for my tree, made with love by my sister @judnickhalley, and the Russian Tea Cake Cookies sent by mom (all arrived in a box of thoughtful gifts last night).

Handmade Felt Ornaments
(family tradition)

I won’t lie. I’ve been on the “Struggle Bus” since mid-October. I’m not discounting moments of joy and peace. I hold them close to my heart to keep me moving forward.

Warm Gifts from family

This has been a very tough year.

My husband’s work is in shutdown (unemployment) for the second time this year. 15 is struggling to keep up with school, participate in clubs, and (sigh) learning to drive. All with social distancing that means only video chats with friends.

My job in Home Health Care has been extremely stressful due to COVID regulations and trying to get 60+ Caregivers on-board with weekly testing (semi-successful) and wearing PPE (slightly more successful). Then add in those who get sick (COVID or just the common cold, stomach bug), those that have small children and are struggling with childcare, school-age children stuck in home learning (because God-forbid ALL towns run on the same plan or schedule), and just everyday catastrophe: car accidents, a slip & fall, a health concern that takes a bad turn… you get the picture.

Then there are our vulnerable clients, constantly worried whether having the help they need is going to cause their demise! It’s not a small concern, for most of our clients, their contact with the outside world comes in the form of our non-medical home caregivers, nurses,and physical therapists. Any number of persons or companies they rely on for their quality of life.

This is STRESSFUL.

I want to do better at LETTING GO of things I can’t control. I am having a hard time with this concept, which feels like it’s in direct conflict with the seriousness of my job.

If you have a stressful job and have been successful at doing your daily best and letting the rest go, I desperately need to HEAR from YOU!!!