For, me, change always comes when I’ve run out of options, I’m in pieces, at the bottom of a pit looking up.
I understand, for some it seems not to be true; but honesty, I don’t believe it. Your bottom may be deeper than someone else’s or the reverse may be true, but if we are HONEST with each other… change comes to us because there IS NO OTHER OPTION.
If we want to grow. If we want to achieve. If we want to heal.
Where ever you are in your journey: on the slide down, the bottom, on that steep climb up… the choice is always in your hands… WHEN to change.
This lesson can be a harsh one. Reality is, until you take responsibility for the choices you make (thoughts, actions,words) you are playing the victim.
Life happens to everyone. Tragedy happens to everyone. There are bad people who do bad things to us.
How you CHOOSE to deal with life, in all its messiness, determines what kind of life you lead.
Your happiness is a choice. Your happiness and success isn’t going to look the same as someone else. Not everyone is meant to be the star, the athlete, the famous… whatever. That doesn’t mean you don’t have a good life, a purposeful life.
Live your life with purpose and meaning. Take responsibility for your mistakes and use the lessons to improve yourself.
Don’t compare yourself or your life to anyone else. Yes, they may have more than you… they may also have more pain, more trials, more responsibility.
Never judge your insides against another person’s outsides. You don’t know their whole story. Their life is not meant for you.
Be your best YOU. Be responsible for YOUR actions. Go after what you want. Remember while you do, all actions and choices have consequences, don’t be shocked when the consequences come knocking on your door.
A) success looks different for everyone. B) Everyone receives opportunities. C) We often miss or don’t grab opportunities because it requires change we are unwilling or not ready to make. D) The only person responsible for where you are (in life) is you.
Some of these statements are hard pills to swallow, even for me.
My reality is that I have had opportunities I missed. I have had opportunities I’ve taken. I’ve worked hard, and I’ve not worked hard. I’m not a millionaire, a business owner, a master of industry, or a PhD. I am STILL A SUCCESS: I’ve come a long way from where I started.
If you want a different life, different circumstances, you will have to WORK for them. You will have to CHANGE. Both work and change are hard and uncomfortable.
Not everyone wants out of their circumstances… regardless of what their words say. There is a comfort in known misery. It is not easy to walk away from the “known” in the face of the unknown and uncomfortable change of GROWTH.
Either way, the choice is personal. Just don’t go blaming others, “the world”, or society, when the CHOICE to stay or move on is really YOURS.
Wherever you are in your process, it’s only you who has the power to make a change in your circumstances.
Philosophy: the power to exercise choice and make decisions without constraint from within or without; autonomy; self-determination.
Freedomdoes not mean I have to agree with you, like you, or personally accept/condone/ support your life choices.
Freedommeans I respect your right to have views, lifestyle, religions beliefs that differ from my own. I make space that allows for differences to co-exists.
Way Back… in the 1970’s and 1980’s:
We took classes in Social Studies, Civics/Government, History (of country and state). IN ELEMENTARY AND MIDDLE SCHOOL!
We studied the Branches of Government.
We learned about Checks & Balances.
We had to MEMORIZE the Preamble to the Constitution! 😱
We were taught the highs and lows in our country and our state’s history.
This is my take-away from MY education:
I learned that MY VOICE matters. My VOTE matters on a community level. My VOTE matters on a State level.
Because My Vote Matters, I need to be educated on how government works. I need to understand that LOCAL and STATE Governments have THE MOST POWER over how I live my daily life, and the quality at which I live it.
I needed to LEARN the function of government in my life and how to use my voice to best effect: at my local and state level.
All that said, if you are not happy with your life… the CHANGE (aka improvement), starts with YOU. Your government can’t and WON’T even try to fix it… NO MATTER WHAT A POLITICIAN PROMISES.
PS: Shout Out to Schoolhouse Rock. They had some great lessons too👍🏻.
This popped up in my WORDPRESS feed at the right time: I’m coming up on my 1-year anniversary for my Blog and considering if it’s serving a purpose, for others, for me.
WHY DO I BLOG? 🤔
I started my blog as a companion to the Facebook Page I was trying to grow into a community of support for people searching for purpose, interested in growing, and wanting to set and accomplish goals.
Admittedly, the first month I thought I’d lost my mind. Thinking I could set up and contribute regularly to a webpage was overwhelming. Though I’d read Blog posts before and enjoyed them, the thought of having a Blog of my own was (and still is) terrifying. I’m great one-to-one, but putting my self “out there” into the world still scares me.
Friends (most of whom don’t even follow my page!) kept encouraging me that I had something worth sharing.
WHAT ARE THE REWARDS?
The biggest reward for me is starring down my fear and putting myself out “there”, wherever that is.
I have a few followers and have received very little feedback, so that side has not yet felt like a reward. However, each time I share some aspect of myself or something that interests me… my fear lessens and I’m more empowered.
The reward is personal: recognizing my voice and accepting that my voice matters, if only to me.
Thanks, Dr. Perry, for your Blog post. This actually made me feel MORE committed to my Blog. I was considering giving it up, but now I see it is fulfilling a purpose: It’s ok if the purpose is me!